I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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