What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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