If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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