I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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