his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
