What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
