There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
