what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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