Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I party with great urgency now.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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