Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
