imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
