she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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