so explain again why im purple
no
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
