i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
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