I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
His nipple licking is glorious
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