i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
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