After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
