now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize