woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
