i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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