Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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