Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize