Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
