you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
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