It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
The best revenge is premature balding
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
