Small penises have feelings too.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
