we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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