Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
