If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
