She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
