I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize