did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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