we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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