Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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