so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
