Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
