Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
