11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Randomize
