we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
