Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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