she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I wish i was in the wii world.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
