Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
