Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
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