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She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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