I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
