shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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