dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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