laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
