it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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