There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
